Marble Blue

The ground begins to race along

Creates a path to move upon

Tree limbs reach out to point the way

Stars guide by night, birds by day

Journey with me on this marble blue

Experience every sound; every hue

Let go of self, become the motion

Move with the tide, be an ocean

Drift and wander wherever you can

Ditch the calendar; scrap the plan

Sink into sleep, immersed in dream

Swirling with your brain jet-stream

Escape the boxes, tear down fences

Drop the façade and learned defenses

Rip away conformists glue

Realize you’re the only you

Side-step anything contrary

Remember it’s all temporary

Focus on the path before you

Lift up others, help them pull through

Forgive those who’ve deeply cut

Rise above the grudgers rut

Laugh and smile and cry and feel

Join me on this plane surreal

Step into a grander light

Soar on clouds above in flight

Float to Heaven on a chariot ride

With eternal joy you shall abide

By Royce Waxenfelter

8/11/23

Stressed?

When you’re a mess

Drowning in stress

Call out to Jesus

He has redeemed us

Exhausted and numb?

He has overcome

Exceptional blessing

Eliminate guessing

The Spirit of Truth

Is positive proof

Rely on the Lord

Relaxed and restored

Trust in the Maker

A mover and shaker

When you confide

God will provide

Burdens unloaded

Blessings bestowed

Uniquely gifted

Spiritually lifted

Set self aside

In Heaven abide

A kingdom renowned

Where joy abounds

Loosen life’s rope

With Heavenly hope 

 

By Royce Waxenfelter

10/28/19

Hell Draws Nigh

       Boughs they are swaying

       Horses are braying

       Clouds in the sky are swiftly not staying

There is a storm on the horizon 

Its time drawing nigh

I look deep in her eyes and

I say, “We’ve got to fly”

Away from impending doom

Away from all dread

Where peace overrules gloom

Like a comforting bed

       A tempest is turning

       Forests are burning

       I scarcely have time to deliver my warning

Flee from destruction

Head to high ground

Escape the abduction

Of the ravenous hound

There is a great surging wave

Dark clouds appear

Which souls will be saved

Which souls remain in fear

       Some scoff and shun me

       Some try to outrun me

       I run to my savior whose sacrifice won me

Why wait for disaster

Just to see if it’s real

Go instead to the Master

He will hear your appeal

Whisked away from eternal damnation

Removed from harm’s way

To a brand new creation

Heaven’s glorious array

Will you cringe, will you cry

Slowly open one eye

What is your plan now that Hell draws nigh?

By Royce Waxenfelter

8/4/23

Changed

Never used to bring my troubles 

To anyone but myself

Never used to read by Bible on the dusty shelf

Never used to need forgiveness

I’d just harbor all the bitter

And I’d spit it out like venom, didn’t want your help

But one day I broke down crying

Under the weight of my own problems

And I knew I needed something so much better than my plan

Since I felt like dying

I gave my life to Jesus

He must’ve have heard me knocking, and let me in

I used to want be rich

Have more money than my father

To never have to work another day in my life

But God changed my heart entirely

Now I live my life more quietly

I place value in the richness of relationship

There’s a liberty in dying

To selfish motivation

When you give desires to Jesus they return improved

There’s a freedom that’s inspiring

Underneath the fount of blessing

        All it takes is a confession, give up your sin

When I was younger I was stronger

I thought I would live forever

I wanted fame and fortune to lift me up

But it all just came up empty

Until I realized there’s plenty

Of joy to go around up in eternity

So I set my eyes on Heaven

And I call upon my savior

He gave his life that I may see eternity

Eternity in Heaven

A goal grounded in foundation

Of the only God who gave His life to save my soul

Now that God has changed me

All those dreams I had so early

Wouldn’t want them back

I don’t have what the world wants

And I don’t have fame or fortune

Now I have something so much better than my plan

There’s a better way of living

And I say this from experience

Of a man who’s tried it both ways and lived to tell the tale

There’s a life worth living today

All you have to do is to say

“Jesus I’ll follow you, I’ll give up my way.”

By Royce Waxenfelter

2.22.23

Note: to the tune of “Love Like This” by Ben Rector

Miserable Me

I’ve messed it up before, I’m going to mess it up again,

Repeat that bad behavior, never let myself win,

I wouldn’t chance a laugh, I wouldn’t dare to smile,

If you’re waiting for me to change it’s gonna be a while.

When everything starts going well,

Whenever life starts to jive and gel,

I’ve got to set the dial back to terrible,

I am only happy when I am feeling miserable.

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

I lead my life disgusted

I steal so I get busted

Sit in the rain ‘til I am rusted

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

The pity party in my mind is full of doubt and loathing,

When I want to express myself, I put on my drab clothing,

When I see a glimpse hope I throw it in the grinder,

I grind it into pieces, I serve it as a reminder.

I don’t deserve pleasure or a day down at the beach,

Everything everyone else has is simply out of reach,

The day I get a raise is the day I’m going to quit,

If you try to cheer me up, I’m going to throw a fit.

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

Going to treat myself unkind

Put myself into a bind

Walk around like I am blind

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

They say misery loves company but they don’t know ‘bout me,

I’ll mope around all by myself ‘til you feel bad for me,

It doesn’t take a psychiatrist to see that I’m in danger,

Put me back inside those padded walls where I am not a stranger.

I’ll say what I need to, get back out into the fray,

The problems will keep coming back, that’s the part I play,

You should take me seriously, though I won’t consider you,

I’ll wallow in my misery ‘cause that’s just what I do.

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

Going to cry out an alarm

Maybe do myself some harm

Wrench and twist my own arm

I’m only happy when I’m miserable

By Royce Waxenfelter

7/24/23

An Ode to Buffalo Joe

Well I left Boston one sunny day about a quarter to ten

Didn’t know where I should go, wish I knew much more back then

I caught the greyhound goin’ west, I pulled my hat down low

Closed my eyes and when I woke up, there was snow on my window

I asked the driver “Where are we, man?” thinkin’ he should know

I reached down in, pulled my pockets out, there was nothin’ much to show

He just frowned, ushered me out and said ‘The streets of Buffalo”

Well the wind up there will blow straight through your body and your soul

I found shelter in an alley downtown underneath a cardboard box

Shivered all night, I could barely feel the toes within my socks

When mornin’ came I made up my mind to get out of Buffalo

I hitched a ride to Orchard Park where they was puttin’ on a show

Buffalo Bills they called themselves, I had seen them on TV

A history of passionate fans, now one of them was me

I snuck in behind a vendor cart, found my way out to the stands

Fans were stompin’ on the metal floor, they had mittens on their hands

Nearly got my eye poked out by a hat with pointed horns

I was lucky just to find a place to sit and watch the show

The big ‘ol man I sat beside introduced himself as Joe

I joked “Is that Cribbs or Ferguson?”, he said “DeLamielleure”

As gregarious and humble as any man I’d ever known

He told me of his playin’ days, of the hall of fame, and more

They won the game, the crowd went wild, the rest you don’t need to know

But I’ll never forget those frozen stands where I met Buffalo Joe

Buffalo Joe stood six foot three with muscles made of brick

Pavin’ the way for running backs, he’d bore holes three feet thick

With McKenzie on the other side they weighed half a thousand pounds

Shove ‘em back now Buffalo Joe, pathways for touchdowns

Go, go, Buffalo Joe, the perennial All-Pro

Number sixty-eight on his jersey, the number one guy I know

Go, go, Buffalo Joe, I’d like to thank you man

For bein’ kind, I hope you know I’ll always be a fan

By Royce Waxenfelter

6/2/23

Mapping Eternity

In a world full of places do you know where to go?

In a universe moving faster than blinks do you know what to know?

The stars are in place, or seemingly so

Do the steps you take determine where you go?

Less than a speck in a galaxy yet you want control

You do what you can, but is it all for show?

The sun blares and blisters

Wind generates twisters

Mountains explode and the cliffsides erode

Less than a blip in time yet you head down the road

Explorers on oceans used stars for navigation

Stars that have been moving since the dawn of creation

Yet the rate the stars travel is steady to gauge

So where will you end up in the next epic age?

Your body is here now, just for a while

So you do what you can, you conjure a smile

You try to find joy in every mile 

You laugh when you can, you try to have style

It’s still very fleeting and it doesn’t make sense

That all this was meant for life to be spent

In search of a journey with your feet in cement

Instead, what if Heaven determined the time that you spend?

Beyond universes, beyond suns and stars

Beyond hurt feelings and personal scars

But within your grasp if you give up control

Is a place where eternity is meant for your soul

A meaningful prize at the end of the rope

A surety gained, a realized hope

A wondrous glory is meant to be found

By those willing to follow Jesus’ words so profound

Not me you might say, Jesus isn’t for me

With so many paths, I’ll be the one to find one meant for me

While it’s true that the map you follow is for you to determine

Remember to consider failings with learnings

Place what you’ve learned like a coin in your purse

How does it measure against the vast universe

Think about space and time; realize it’s odd

To think that your concept is bigger than God

The map to eternity is open for you to read

The Bible is the God-given map that you need

To give meaning to this life for now and forever

To make sure your destination is worth the endeavor

In a world full of places do you know where to go?

In a universe moving faster than blinks do you know what to know?

By Royce Waxenfelter

05/22/23

Gone, So Long

I took a day to wonder why

The day you left, the life I cry

Well I went out to see the sun

There’s only grey, the light is gone

I thought about the time we had

The things we shared when things were bad

We had something deep, something true

But all that’s left is dismal blue

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    Are gone

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    So long

Like a snowflake in the wind you are gone

Like a leaf out on the river you float along

Like a cloud up in the sky you dissipate

Like water down the drain on a rainy day

I spent the morning with my old man

He told me there’s a bigger plan

I scoffed at him and bit my lip

It wasn’t him you gave the slip

Now each day feels like a year

As sadness fuels my lonely fear

It’s never ending, where are you

You’re not with me, that much is true

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    Are gone

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    So long

Someday I hope you realize

That I was meant to be your guy

Someday you’ll know my big regret

Until that day, I’ll be in debt

Will you listen to my plea

Why are you so sick of me

What did I do to seal my fate

To make you scrape me off your plate

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    Are gone

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    So long

Now I sit here all depressed

In my own home I’m like a guest

Nothing here is comforting

This empty couch, this empty ring

For now I have to just pretend

And wish I did much more to mend

I should have done things differently

Then maybe you’d be here with me

    But You oo-oo-oo oo

    Are gone

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    So long

Like a snowflake in the wind you are gone

Like a leaf out on the river you float along

Like a cloud up in the sky you dissipate

Like water down the drain on a rainy day

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    Are gone

    You oo-oo-oo oo

    So long

By Royce Waxenfelter

2/1/23

Fall Downfall

I stumble in for coffee, I spit on the ground

I humbly despise this New England town

I step outside and the colors fall down

All of God’s splendor are the leaves on the ground

I get what I need and drag myself home

I sit on the couch, I sit all alone

I escape to my phone to buy gems that aren’t real

But there’s no escaping the regret that I feel

    “Boston in the fall,” she said

    Her bucket list dream

    But we never made it

    As sad as it seems

I used to get high, an excuse to get low

My wife was patient, much more than you’d know

I’d lie and I’d promise “We’ll get there someday,

We’ll travel the world, we’ll see everything.”

But I’d spend all my time in a world in my phone

The day my wife died she was virtually alone

A little too late and after withdrawal

I packed and I moved up to Boston that fall

    “Boston in the fall,” she said

    Her bucket list dream

    But we never made it

    As sad as it seems

I should have done right by her, but I put it off

Now whatever I try to do just isn’t enough

I just quit trying again and close all the blinds

Try to black out the colors engrained in my mind

I dream she is here with me, Boston in the fall

Her eyes full of jubilance, her spirit enthralled

Her hopeful exuberance, her gleeful call

My waking reality is my fall downfall

    “Boston in the fall,” she said

    Her bucket list dream

    But we never made it

    As sad as it seems

By Royce Waxenfelter

4/19/23

My Curb

I take a spot in the back of the line

This seedy bar, these seedy times

I look like a trucker after a long haul

A running back who dropped the ball

It’s the way I feel when you look past me

It’s the hurt of loathing that makes me flee

It’s the leprous syndrome you place on me

It’s what makes my gut turn inside of me

    Skip me over

    Pass me up

    Take my carcass to the dump

    Watch me shiver

    See my grit

    Throw me in the deepest pit

I wake beside my concrete curb

Hardened gum spells do not disturb

I must seem like a stammering slobbering fool

A rejected jester in a pile of drool

What I wouldn’t give to have a bed

A place to rest my weary head

Where I am seen and I am heard

Where I exist in every world

    Skip me over

    Pass me up

    Take my carcass to the dump

    Watch me shiver

    See my grit

    Throw me in the deepest pit

I eat outside the shelter door

Not a sneer original

Not a mocking stabbing curse

I haven’t heard to tell my worth

The hope is fake, the hope is nigh

It isn’t hope that gets me high

Hope is what you think you provide

When you pander to your giving side

    So skip me over

    Pass me up

    Take my carcass to the dump

    Watch me shiver

    See my grit

    Throw me in the deepest pit

I sleep beside my lonely curb

I mumble my unmeaningful blurb

I take the handouts every one

I’ve placed myself beneath your shun

I am a man without a home

A restless wandering forgotten soul

A grubby dirty cursed word

Growing fond of my very own curb

By Royce Waxenfelter

8/1/23