I wish I believed in ghosts

You aren’t here anymore
The emptiness is haunting
How will we live without you?
The climb ahead is daunting


If you were here today
You’d make us laugh and smile
We’d hold you close and love you
But I’m afraid we’re in denial

Because we want to see you
In every room, around every corner
The lack of you makes the house feel
Like a vague and unknown foreigner


So we recall fondest memories
We take pictures out to cry
And when grief punches us again
We let out a hurt-filled sigh


We try to look for hope to come
We yearn for joy that’s missing
And cry again upon confirming
The hollow hope we’re wishing


That’d you’d be there when we get home
You’d be back like you weren’t gone
And life would go on happily
And the funeral was wrong


Since that lie eludes us
We are wrestling with the wind
Reaching out for something tangible
Gaining nothing but pretend


I wish I believed in ghosts
At least then I’d have a reason
For hearing you echo in my head
Seeing you in every season


All we can do is forge ahead
As we struggle through this blindness
And try to share with others
Your unique way of showing kindness


You will always be in our heart
And in our memory
We take comfort knowing you’re not hurting
And from these earthly bonds you’re free.



By Royce Waxenfelter
1/15/2020